


A Cruel Mistake

by orphan_account



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Angst, F/M, I Don't Even Know, In which Asuka is really scared of being a mom, Listening to Music, Pregnancy Test, Suicide contemplation, Teen Pregnancy, Too many paragraph breaks lol, Unplanned Pregnancy, thE PAIN IS REAL
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-02-23
Packaged: 2018-03-14 17:07:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3418727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was real. Horribly, disgustingly real. As real as the bleak world they were living in, as real as the Angels. As real as the fact that her mother had tried to kill her several times. </p>
<p>Basically a really fucking angsty drabble about Asuka being pregnant.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Cruel Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> This is like....my first fic for NGE, and I'm not going to post it on my main account because it's got a lot of really heavy stuff (I.E. Asuka contemplating suicide), and this account is my misc. fandoms one, my main is more a SNK-centric one.

A whole week this had been going on. A week of waking up just to have to empty the little contents that were in her stomach. A week of mood swings worse than anything she had ever experienced before. The cherry on top of of this shitty week was an offhand remark from Misato that rang in the back of her mind.

 

“ _ **Maybe you're pregnant or something.”**_

 

Asuka shook her head, the thought of it making her ten times as sick.

 

Those words haunted her for another week. The only hope she had was the prospect of her period coming in a few days, it was the only time she had ever looked forward to “shark week” in her life. She told herself it was just a horrible case of PMS.

 

_It's coming tomorrow. Shinji didn't get me knocked up._

 

One day late.

 

_It's normal for it to not come exactly on time._

 

Two days.

 

_It's only been two days, that's not anything. It's been 3 months late before and I wasn't pregnant!_

 

Three days.

 

_Tomorrow. It's coming tomorrow. I'm going to wake up and I'll be soakedf in blood as per usual._

 

Four days.

 

_Tomorrow. It's going to fucking come tomorrow._

 

Five days.

 

_It's going to catch me off guard._

 

Six days.

 

_Please, just let it come tomorrow. I can't bring a baby into this world._

 

Seven days.

 

_I can't be. Please don't let me be._

 

Eight.

 

_I'll take a test. One of those fancy digital ones. It's going to be expensive, but it won't give one of those faint lines that you can't tell if it's positive or not._

 

 

She stood stiff as a board at the display in the pharmacy. It shouldn't be too hard, right? Grab the test, go to the counter. Easy peasy. She snatched the box, running to the checkout counter.

 

“Did you find everything alright?” The cashier asked, cheerful.

“Yeah yeah, it's fine.” Asuka choked out, handing over the box.

“I.D.?” The cashier asked, looking at her with his eyebrow raised.

“Gott verdammt...” She muttered, rummaging in her purse and looking at her NERV I.D. card.

 

She stiffened up again upon seeing the “AGE: 16” on it. She was 16 years old and possibly carrying the child of her “friend”.

 

“Miss?” The cashier inquired, looking over the counter.

“H-here.” She gulped, showing the card.

“Okay, that'll be ¥3570.91.” He chirped, entering the price into the register and printing a receipt.

“O-okay.” Asuka muttered, dumping out most of the contents of her wallet onto the counter. “Keep the change.”

 

She locked herself in the bathroom once she got back to the apartment, skimming over the instructions.

 

“I have to wait until the morning? Well, accurate results are important...” Asuka scoffed, hiding the box in a seldom used cabinet.

 

That was probably the longest night of Asuka's life. She kept going over the details of how it happened in her head. Three and a half months ago she had started a secret relationship with Shinji, hoping nobody would find out. Two months ago they had slept together in a foolish, rushed decision. Now she was paying the price for that.

 

After 2 hours of tossing and turning, she finally got up and took some sleeping pills. She thought for a few minutes about overdosing on them.

 

_I can't do that to Shinji. He's lost enough already._

 

Asuka only took one, shoving the bottle back in the mirror cabinet. She slept like a baby after that.

 

She awoke to Shinji's voice.

 

“Hey, you awake? I'm making pancakes if you want any.” He cooed.

“Of course I'm awake, you idiot.” She growled, throwing a pillow at him.

“O-okay, I'll be going now.” Shinji yelped, closing the door. He was so perfect. If the situationthey were in was anything else, she'd be elated to be having his kid.

 

_Wait..._

 

_**THE TEST.** _

 

Asuka scrambled out of bed, grabbing her phone and running to the bathroom.

 

“Okay, the instructions.” She yawned, reading the directions with extreme attention to detail. “The test will beep when finished...it takes upwards of 3 minutes?! What the fuck?!”

 

She couldn't wait 5 minutes without some distraction. Asuka pondered what she was going to do, before noticing her phone on the edge of the sink.

 

“I'll put it on shuffle.” She sighed, upcapping the test.

 

After taking the test, she got up, putting it on the sink and opening the music app on her phone and pressing “SHUFFLE ALL SONGS”. A familiar beat started.

 

“...Out of all the songs you could choose, it has to be Blank Space?” Asuka snorted, rolling her eyes and slumping against the wall.

 

She did really like the song, but right now the lyrics weren't really comforting.

 

“Yeah, Shinji did look like my next mistake...” She lamented, staring up at the ceiling. “...Cute little idiot.”

 

Asuka mouthed along with the song, forgetting about everything for a moment. For once she actually felt somewhat happy. She lost track of time, nearly forgetting that she had to listen for the test to beep.

 

And then it did.

 

She yelped, accidentally smacking her head on the wall.

 

“Here goes...” She sighed, getting up, closing her eyes, and picking up the test.

 

Asuka let out a long breath, slowly opening her eyes, looking down.

 

_**Pregnant** _

_**2-3** _

 

This wasn't happening. This wasn't real. It was just a nightmare. She was going to wake up, take the test for real, and it would be negative. She couldn't be pregnant. She wasn't.

 

A thump sounded from the door, coupled with a loud groan of pain. Asuka took a step back as the door handle rattled, eventually opening.

 

“I heard you scream, what's wrong?” Shinji panted, looking to around the room before finally looking at the test. “What's that...?”

“I'm sorry.” Asuka sobbed.

 

It was real. Horribly, disgustingly real. As real as the bleak world they were living in, as real as the Angels. As real as the fact that her mother had tried to kill her several times.  


End file.
